Sweaty puppet caricatures not included

I must’ve pruned a thousand shrubs
I clipped ‘em down to stumpy stubs
And I can open bottles too
Among other things I can do

‘Cause did you see the Woot today?
I bought that thingy right away
It’s just the thing a fellow needs
To cut stuff and to pull up weeds

There’s too many men
Too many people
Facing too many problems
Without this tool that I’ve found
Can’t you see? This is a Corona Fusion

This is the wire stripper
And this here is the bag ripper
Use them around your house, it’s
Amazing you lived without this tool

A Leatherman this ain’t, that’s true
But it comes at less expense to you
And plus it has a sprinkler tool
Which, frankly, I find pretty cool

This here’s a saw
And this here’s a ruler
Hurry, click if you want one
‘Cause we don’t have tons to go ‘round
Dunno why; it’s just a Corona Fusion

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