Transcript from August 31, 2008 Creative Department security recordings, as requested by Woot Accounting regarding the eMachines W3609 3.33Ghz/512mb/120GB Desktop PC order

Jason: I’VE GOT FRIENNNNNDS IN LOOWWWWWWWWW PLAAAAACES
Matthew: WHERE THE SOMETHING SOMETHING OOOOASISSSS AND
Dave: Hey, I don’t know where the f I parked.
Scott: Dude, no big deal, we can’t drive right now anyway
Matthew: Who wants another Vodka and Jager shot?
Jason: Double!
Scott: Hey, let’s just… wait, I forgot what I was saying.
Dave: You were saying pizza.
Scott: Hey, Jason’s right, we need to sleep.
Dave: No, I said pizza.
Matthew: Are you Jason?
Scott: I don’t think I can see the floor any more.
Jason: We need pizza!
Dave: Aw, dude, we need to order some computers for the Woot-Off.
Matthew: I want a Mac! A Mac and Vodka!
Scott: Wait, wait, I wanna call. Wait. Wait. It’s ringing. It’s ringing.
Operator: Hello, eMachines Warehouse.
Scott: HELLO? WE WANT A PEPPERONI AND JAGER!
Dave: Half veggie for me!
Scott: HALF PEPPERONI AND JAGER, HALF VODKA/ONION
Operator: Sir, we sell computers.
Scott: Oh, that is correct. You passed… my little test.
Operator: Would you like to order some computers?
Scott: Yes we could… would. We would like… do you have Celery?
Operator: A Celeron D? The processor that was launched on June 25th, 2004?
Matthew: See if they have cheesy bread!
Scott: Yes, 64 bit celery. And… how many megs in a gallon of 7Up?
Operator: Sir, we don’t have 7Up. We don’t have any soda.
Scott: JASON THEY DON’T HAVE SODA. We’ll have 512 MB of DDR2 RAM then.
Operator: Sir, you’ll be running Microsoft Windows Vista on this computer.
Scott: DON’T QUESTION MY METHODS, CHIEF I’M A GOOD COP
Matthew: He found the peanut I dropped in the bar!
Scott: THAT’S RIGHT I’M A DETECTIVE LIKE BATMAN
Scott: WHY SO SERIOUS
Operator: I think that was the Joker, sir.
Scott: You are a good… she is a good detective too. We should team up.
Operator: Would you like a 15-in-1 Digital Media Manager installed as well, sir?
Scott: And cheezy bread. And send it to Texas care of Matt Rutledge. By truck. No b- no boats. AT ALL.
Operator: No, sir, no boats. Thank you for your order, your eMachines W3609 3.33Ghz/512mb/120GB Desktop PCs are on the way.
Jason: Are we getting soda?
Matthew: I want cherry coke and Jager!
Dave: The woot-off should be exciting.
Scott: Why am I holding a phone?

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