Some people might find it a titch grandiose to name a mere USB drive after the exalted weapon of Britain’s greatest king. But when you actually compare this Excalibur 4GB USB 2.0 Portable Drive to the original Excalibur, you might be surprised at how well it stacks up:

USB Connectivity
The Sword Excalibur: None, without some pretty intensive hacking.
Excalibur 4GB USB 2.0 Portable Drive: Yes. See? It’s right there in the name.
Advantage: Excalibur 4GB USB 2.0 Portable Drive

Storage Space
The Sword Excalibur: None to speak of, although in some tellings of the legend, Morgan le Fay magically adds a slot for SD/MMC cards.
Excalibur 4GB USB 2.0 Portable Drive: 4 GB, duh.
Advantage: Excalibur 4GB USB 2.0 Portable Drive

Magical Powers
The Sword Excalibur: Blinds its enemies when first drawn.
Excalibur 4GB USB 2.0 Portable Drive: Under the right conditions, can allow the bearer to communicate with clams, mussels, and other shellfish. At press time, nobody has ever found those conditions.
Advantage: The Sword Excalibur

Etymology
The Sword Excalibur: Unknown; possibly derived from Old French, Latin, or Welsh.
Excalibur 4GB USB 2.0 Portable Drive: Known; derives from the sword.
Advantage: Excalibur 4GB USB 2.0 Portable Drive

As A Melee Weapon
The Sword Excalibur: A guy with a big enough gun could still kill you.
Excalibur 4GB USB 2.0 Portable Drive: A guy with a big enough gun could still kill you.
Advantage: Draw

Price & Availability
The Sword Excalibur: Cannot be bought at any price – only the worthy may either pull it from the stone or receive it from the Lady of the Lake, depending on which issue of Classics Illustrated you’re going by.
Excalibur 4GB USB 2.0 Portable Drive: Just $24.99 for anybody with a credit card and a mailing address in the lower 48. We don’t care how worthy you are – just how credit-worthy.
Advantage: Excalibur 4GB USB 2.0 Portable Drive

There you have it, clear proof that the Excalibur 4GB USB 2.0 Portable Drive makes the sword Excalibur look like a plastic butterknife. Hey, when you look at the word “sword” over and over, it starts to look more like it should be pronounced “S-word” (you know, like f-word or the Showtime original series The L-Word). True story!

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