Knock knock! The Feds are at the door! The lead guy, a burly mustache ‘n’ mirror-shades type, is waving a piece of paper around, and it sure looks like a search warrant from here. No doubt they’ve come for that incriminating evidence on your hard drive. Your henchmen can stall them long enough for you to destroy the PC (and hence, the data) with your trusty mahogany walking stick, but then it’s lost to you, too. Think fast – what to do, what to do?

If you’ve got a MicroGEM QuickiDrive 2GB USB MicroDrive, the answer is simple: hook that mug up, save the important stuff, secrete the drive in a bodily cavity, and start swinging that mahogany. With 2GB of storage space, there’s room for hundreds of spreadsheets, memos, photos, and video clips documenting your misdeeds. And with the fast USB 2.0 plug & play connection, your sensitive data will be safely stored before you hear the jackboots charging up the stairs. Don’t worry about it breaking when it’s tucked into its special hiding place: the durable skin of rubbero-plastic will take the worst you can dish out, and it won’t chafe your fleshy parts too badly.

Why physically destroy the PC instead of just deleting the files? Turns out, even after you hit “delete,” a savvy techie type can still recover your data. And the Feds have a bunch of these guys working for them. Speaking of which, we gotta go: the guards are coming by to take us out to the Yard. Whoopee! Exercise time!

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