Each morning, the queen stood before the mirror and ask, “Mirror, Mirror On The Wall, Who Is Fairest Of Them All?” And the mirror would always say “You, my queen!” and the queen would be happy.

But then, one day, the mirror said “Snow White, my queen, is fairest of all!” and this made the queen very angry. Because the queen spent a lot of money on surgery in order to impress her talking mirror. So the queen bought a Disney Princess Movie Maker for the lovely Snow White, and sent her out into the world to make documentaries, because seeing the harsh underbelly of the world is the best way to lose your innocence and beauty.

Using the six minutes of video and audio that the 32MB internal memory would hold, Snow White slowly used the Disney Flix software to edit together a study of Dwarf Culture, finding herself fascinated by the strange little men who worked in the mine. Soon she began to feel guilty that she had grown up in a ruling class family, and considered getting an anthropology degree. Thankfully, her videos had been transfered to the internet through the USB connection, and were noticed by a handsome prince.

Snow White soon accepted the prince’s offer of funding, intending to make an expose on the way the neighboring kingdom used mice as coachmen in order to save on money. But then she was offered the new Meg Ryan picture, and that was a big step forward. So she decided to put those projects on the back burner and think of her career for once.

Within the year, Snow White was using her Disney Princess Movie Maker to remake a public domain fairy tale that became a smashing success. Her prince knew a senator who used to host a variety show with his rock star ex-wife, and so the three of them worked to draft legislation that would ensure copyright law would be favorable to Snow’s long term goals. Within five years, Snow White was being described as a “triple threat” and ran her own entertainment company that condemned Congressional oversight at the same time it lobbied for extensions that changed the nature of a law intended to protect artists, not businessmen.

And the mirror never said another word.

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