Tote it with you around the manor, from the study to the billiard room to the conservatory, like Professor Plum’s lead pipe. The onboard LCD display and volume, play, skip, back, pause, and stop controls let you punch up just the right tune for the occasion. Do the laundry to “Dirty Laundry”! Listen to “Bitchin’ Camaro” while you work on your bitchin’ Camaro! Have a milkshake with “My Milkshake”! The possibilities are approximately limitless.

“But surely,” you scoff, “such a mobile electro-music megaphonator certainly suffers a grievous loss of fidelity and presence!” Our reply: where’d you learn English, Bleak House? As to the speakers, you’re dead wrong, Chuzzlewit: thanks to true digital quality 2.1 stereo with active bass, neodymium tweeters, and a dedicated subwoofer, the Saitek A250 sounds as clear and heavy as a crystal sledgehammer.

If the wireless thing doesn’t move you, jack your mp3 player directly into it for a mainline rush of sweet, pure, irresistible sound. After one listen to the Saitek A250, you’ll be forced to agree: its milkshake is indeed better than yours.

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