They may be similar-sounding Japanese words, but there’s a big difference between sudoku and seppuku. The former means “single number in an allotted place”, and has become the name for the world’s fastest-growing number-place-allotting game sensation. The other roughly translates as “belly slicing,” and is the name for a gory ritual wherein a disgraced samurai guts himself and is then decapitated to atone for a serious failing – like, say, dropping a crucial pop fly during the championship game of the All-Samurai Softball Invitational.

Another difference: Woot has no plans to sell seppuku equipment (not in the next few weeks, anyway), but today we carve out our slice of the multi-kazillion dollar sudoku industry. This  Sudoku Handheld Electronic Game with Touch Screen brings the maddening numerical amusement into the electronic age thanks to cutting-edge 1990’s technology. Thousands of puzzles at three difficulty levels are waiting for you inside the cold cyberguts of this handheld dungeonmaster, each one more fun than the next. Forget bulky, unsightly pen and paper – these games play out entirely on the LCD screen. And despite the prevalence of numbers, the game doesn’t involve any math, so Pentagon accountants can enjoy sudoku just like normal people do.

“Now wait just a minute,” you exclaim. “Every newspaper in America carries sudoku puzzles now, and there are more sudoku books than there are Left Behind and Chicken Soup books combined. What does this handheld game offer that those other sudoku sources don’t?” The answer: a way to dispose of all those extra batteries you’ve got laying around, two AAA’s at a time (none included). Now click “I Want One” – and get sudokucizing!