My dad was all “You tampered with your sister’s birthday list.” Tampered, like I put, like, a needle in her candy bar or something. So now I’m, like, grounded for, like, ever. But it was still totally worth it.

It’s her own fault. She totally thought it was, like, funny to put that picture of me on Facebook. The one from when I was, like, twelve where I’m picking my nose in the swimming pool. Like she never picks her nose. So anyway, I just, like, added a couple of letters to her birthday list when she wasn’t looking. Just, like, a T and an R, so it said “tripod”.

On her birthday, it was, like, so funny to watch her open that Sunpak Platinum Plus Tripod. Mom and Dad were totally, like, smiling and everything like they got her some great present, and she was all like “Um, what?” And Dad went “It’s that tripod you asked for! See, it’s got a smooth-turning three-way pan head and a 3.3-pound load capacity. The guy at the camera store said that was pretty good.” Then she goes, like, “I don’t even have a camera, I wanted an iPod” and they totally have this big argument and it totally, like, ruined my sister’s birthday. It was, like, awesome.

Then they looked at the list and, like, figured out my handwriting. So I, like, totally got in trouble. All I ever do is, like, sit in my room and, like, listen to music anyway, so it doesn’t even, like, matter and I don’t even care…hey, have you, like, seen my iPod?

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