I am Twilight. I am The Shadows. I am A Focused Instrument Of Pure Revenge. But I also inherited a vast fortune that allowed me to attend some of the finest schools in America and be on the guest list of any party worldwide. So naturally, I golf.

The citizens have come to know the flashing red light high above the rooftops. The light of the Twilight Tracer 3-pack Lighted Golf Balls. Those who are innocent, they smile, knowing that it is a slow night and I have time to practice my swing. Those who are guilty, they cower, knowing that my wrath at being interrupted is a hazard no sand trap will ever equal.

My well-considered shots light the city, my city. She is My Mother, My Lover, My Waitress, My Babysitter, The Lady Across The Street Who Never Closes Her Blinds. Some people say I have women issues, but I don’t see it.

The Twilight Tracer 3-pack Lighted Golf Balls are programmed to flash at a rate of 7.2 flashes per second. Each ball is regulation, but with an inner core of proprietary circuitry and a lithium battery. The cover is Surlyn, the choice of the golf industry for decades. I keep spares in my utility belt and my custom-built golf cart. My tools, my weapons, my armor, aiding me on the war to win the perfect game. Oh, and crime. I’m all about crime.

I am Twilight. I am The Shadows. When they see the Twilight Tracer 3-pack Lighted Golf Balls they mark my passing and tremble at how close they might have been. Mother. Father. I bring justice to silence the screams, your screams, that I hear in my head. But can you just keep it down for a second here? This is a really hard putt.

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