We need to have a look at your addition.

I understand, ma’am. You may call it a Zing Foam Sweet Foam Playhouse, but the State Zoning Board calls it a Class 3 External Addition to your domicile, and as such it’s subject to regulation. I’ll be out of your hair as soon as possible.

Let’s see, 70” long, 50” wide, 49” tall. Ma’am, are you aware these dimensions don’t allow for adequate fire escapes or for a reasonably-sized adult to stand? Children? No, ma’am. I don’t think you should keep children in here if you can’t even get in. Play house? Well, kids do what they want, I guess.

Now I commend you on the waterproof panels. They’ll stay bright even after sun exposure, but I don’t see one single bit of weather reinforcement or earthquake-proofing. This thing could come down like a house of cards right back into the clear plastic carrying case it stores in. I’m afraid we’re going to have to fine you until you can get it fixed. It’ll be $100 a day, unless of course MY kids can come over and play in it too.

Yes ma’am, this is how high-powered zoning deals work.

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