Next Meeting Is At The Taco Bell: Woot Weads The Wire

by Scott Lydon

Every week in this space, we’ll take a look at the news and offer our own incisive blend of commentary, analysis, and poop jokes. The news you need, from a voice you can trust, in the 90 seconds you have to spare: that’s Woot Weads the Wire.

NEW YORK (UPI) -- Apple's chief executive has hinted at something Apple fans have wanted for a long time, an Apple-made television, saying TV is an area "of great interest."

Apple TV is expected to only deal with actors who join the Apple Screen Actors Guild. No strike is ever anticipated, because they'll just work.


Apples in Hardanger


DENVER (UPI) -- A task force charged with implementing Colorado's recreational marijuana law held its first meeting Monday.

The meeting started well, but fell apart at roughly twenty minutes after four.

MARENGO, Ill.(UPI) -- An Illinois market owner said a potato chip resembling the baby Jesus led him to build an entire nativity scene from chips.

In keeping with the Biblical theme, the official flavor of the chips is listed as "Lot's Wife And Vinegar."

Kosher Salt


WASHINGTON (UPI) -- U.S. singer-songwriter Carole King has been named the 2013 recipient of the Library of Congress Gershwin Prize for Popular Song.

Insiders question the decision, saying it is obvious that she had a friend.

CODY, Wyo. (UPI) -- A wolf described as "the most famous in the world" was shot and killed outside Yellowstone National Park, officials in Wyoming said.

Rest in peace, Wolf Blitzer.

Apples in Hardanger from Tecfan and Kosher Salt from are used under a Creative Commons License.