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Sean University: Cos-Work

by Sean Adams

Halloween is all about dressing up, acting silly, and eating candy. Sounds like a fun time, right? Well, it can also be stressful. Everyone wants their costume to be the best one. They spend hours and hours sewing and building, trying to outdo each other.

The pressure is even greater if there’s an organized costume contest. The winners will brag and gloat while the losers will cry and claim foul play. Fights will start. Obscenities will be yelled. Clothing will be torn just enough to be irreparable, but not enough to be sexy. It will be total chaos.

Now, you’re probably thinking, “Well then, I’m definitely not doing one of those in my workplace.” But hold on just a second! As I’ve said before, office contests are great, and a Halloween Costume Contest is no exception. You just need to make sure there are enough winnable categories for everyone to comes out on top.

To lead by example, I’m providing the categories that we judge for here at The Sean Adams University of Business Management Development Leadership:

  • Best costume to incorporate a purple scarf
  • Tallest costume
  • Best cat costume (literal)
  • Best cat costume (subtextual)
  • Strongest smelling costume (smell must be related to costume)
  • Costume that would burn the quickest if set on fire (no testing!)
  • The “Whoa, that’s a wig?” award
  • Coldest costume
  • Most dizzying costume
  • Costume most likely to be confused with a piece of furniture
  • Costume with the most wings
  • Costume with the least wings
  • Costume with just enough wings
  • Most expensive costume
  • Automatic award for anyone who makes a costume out of pipe-cleaners alone
  • Reddest nose (whether it’s part of the costume or not)
  • Best hooded costume (hood up) Best hooded costume (hood down)
  • Insectiest costume

With these, everyone wearing a costume should be rewarded. But maybe not. So, please, suggest additional categories in the comments below!